I haven't written in a long time. I read my last post and I realise that I have been having a hard time, for 3 months now. Do you think it's normal to have the perfect time and be in love with someone for 2 months and the same portion, filled with sorrow? I dont' think it is.
I broke up two days ago. For the third time. But now I am sure that there is no turning back. She doesn't want me as a lover, only as a friend. I guess she likes me as a person. Only.
Do I mind? Well yes...I fell for her. Although she claims she fell in love with me, I can't help but wonder, whether this was love or just a deep connection. Anyway, it doesn't matter.
The point is that in a relationship we are all entitled in having all our needs fullfilled, emotional and physical. I felt for a long time ( God, things were dying for a long time - how did I not see it?), that this was a "half" relationship. I was ready for it, she wasn't.
In fact I was ready to commit, to love, and to dedicate myself to one person. Something that until 6 months ago, I was sure I couldn't, I thought it wasn't who I was meant to be.
But now I now...I can do it.
Maybe this is the best thing that came out of this whole 5 month story.
My friends tell me it's a great achievement and at the end of the day I am the winner.
Probably they are right.
But at the moment I am so emotionally hurt that I cannot even think about it. My only thought is that I am too tired of being single. Really.
I broke up two days ago. For the third time. But now I am sure that there is no turning back. She doesn't want me as a lover, only as a friend. I guess she likes me as a person. Only.
Do I mind? Well yes...I fell for her. Although she claims she fell in love with me, I can't help but wonder, whether this was love or just a deep connection. Anyway, it doesn't matter.
The point is that in a relationship we are all entitled in having all our needs fullfilled, emotional and physical. I felt for a long time ( God, things were dying for a long time - how did I not see it?), that this was a "half" relationship. I was ready for it, she wasn't.
In fact I was ready to commit, to love, and to dedicate myself to one person. Something that until 6 months ago, I was sure I couldn't, I thought it wasn't who I was meant to be.
But now I now...I can do it.
Maybe this is the best thing that came out of this whole 5 month story.
My friends tell me it's a great achievement and at the end of the day I am the winner.
Probably they are right.
But at the moment I am so emotionally hurt that I cannot even think about it. My only thought is that I am too tired of being single. Really.
