28 November 2006

The Beatles said...

I became a Beatles' fan when I was 20. It was then, that I could read between the lines. My all time favourite song of theirs was "Get Together" (so sexy). Some years ago I had to help my sister who was studying music on her essay on "Eleanor Rigby", one of Beatles' least know songs.
I immediately felt a connection to it. I was only 23 and I already feared of loneliness.
Today I bought the latest collection of their songs called "Love". This is also the name of the latest performance by Cirque du Soleil, in Las Vegas.
Anyways, as I am listening to it now, I remembered again, that time when I was reading for Eleanor Rigby. Do you remember the lyrics? Here's how they went:
"Ah, look at all the lonely people.
Ah, look at all the lonely people.
Eleanor Rigby picks up the rice in the church where a wedding has been,
Lives in a dream.
Waits at the window, wearing a face she keeps in a jar by the door,
Who is it for?All the lonely people, where do they all come from?
All the lonely people, where do they all belong?
Father McKenzie, writing the words of a sermon that no-one will hear,
No-one comes near
Look at him working, darning his socks in the night when there’s nobody there,
What does he care?
All the lonely people, where do they all come from?
All the lonely people, where do they all belong?
Ah, look at all the lonely people.
Ah, look at all the lonely people.
Eleanor Rigby died in the church and was buried along with her name.
Nobody came.
Father McKenzie, wiping the dirt from his hands as he walks from the grave.
No-one was saved.
All the lonely people, where do they all come from?
All the lonely people, where do they all belong?"
I don't like loneliness. These days, however, even when I'm around people I feel so lonely. I don't dare admiting it to anyone. I don't think they'll understand. Even if they do, they won't admit it.
But do you know what the worst part is? Feeling lonely because it's the best you can feel.

27 November 2006

My not so important life

My Life. It ain't at its best right now. Things are happening.Things that do not concern me. Things that are "supposed" to be part of me. But they are not. Because, I am not me these days.
My Life. It's not important. Not to anyone. Not to me. It's not important enough, to discuss it with people. That's why I am creating this space. To be able to express myself, without having to explain why. Without having to give a damn of any opinions. Who needs opinions when as I grow older, I know that not even mine opinions on my life, really count?
My Life. It will be mine, when I start seeing it, really seeing it.