These Xmas have been strange. To be honest I want these holidays to just go away.
Everything that I had planned for, was ruined and on top of that we spent the holidays in the hospital. Terrible. I know some people have more problems than the ones me and my family have, but you know, when things happen to you, you don't really think about the "worse cases".
I ve learnt a couple of things these past few days:
1. Family is really important. But I felt trapped in it.
2. I need to "grow up" and stop counting on my parents. They ,now, need to count on me.
3. "Hoping" isn't always a good thing. Hoping that your life will change is not always good. Cause it might not change. So it's better to deal with the things you have right now that "hoping".
4. Real friends are the ones who don't magically disappear when you, for some reason, do.
5. Just when you lose hope in finding your place in this earth, somethings (small things) make you start believing again. Even if these things don't give you the solution you want.
6. There isn't a solution for anything. Just means to get by a bit each time.
7. Falling in love is difficult, I guess. I am a difficult person.
8. It's good not to think of the past in terms of "It was better back then", because back then I wasn't 100% happy either.
9. I love my 6 month old scar in the hand, it's alive and it's mine.
10. I really do need to fall in love. I have missed intense feelings.
Everything that I had planned for, was ruined and on top of that we spent the holidays in the hospital. Terrible. I know some people have more problems than the ones me and my family have, but you know, when things happen to you, you don't really think about the "worse cases".
I ve learnt a couple of things these past few days:
1. Family is really important. But I felt trapped in it.
2. I need to "grow up" and stop counting on my parents. They ,now, need to count on me.
3. "Hoping" isn't always a good thing. Hoping that your life will change is not always good. Cause it might not change. So it's better to deal with the things you have right now that "hoping".
4. Real friends are the ones who don't magically disappear when you, for some reason, do.
5. Just when you lose hope in finding your place in this earth, somethings (small things) make you start believing again. Even if these things don't give you the solution you want.
6. There isn't a solution for anything. Just means to get by a bit each time.
7. Falling in love is difficult, I guess. I am a difficult person.
8. It's good not to think of the past in terms of "It was better back then", because back then I wasn't 100% happy either.
9. I love my 6 month old scar in the hand, it's alive and it's mine.
10. I really do need to fall in love. I have missed intense feelings.
8 comments:
I'm sorry your holiday plans went down the drain hunny, I know what its like to spend KisSmAs in hospital, I do feel for you and hope your ok, seriously!
As I sit here, listening to Amy Winehouse: Rehab - I hold my glass of water (yes, water, not wine or beer - Im behaving ;-) ) up and I say a toast to you chick.
Here's to friendship, here's to saying goodbye to the old year, a horrible year for both of us, and here's to saying hello to a new year full of sunshine, smiles and love :-)
I for one am very glad to have you around chick, thanks for being here :-)
xXx
Hope is certainly a dangerous way to live your life. Easier than dealing with reality, though ;-)
Mad :) thank you!
I really dont mind about the holiday plans. It's this whole "growing up so suddenly and kinda violently" that sort of put me off board.
So here's to saying bye to a lousy year and here's to a promising one!
Jemima...do you think so? Because I cannot handle reality it seems and I have lost hope as well. so what is there left to do? Curious to find out!
Me too,I have a bunch of things why this year everything went just terrible..Every facet of my life is always declining and exacerbating...But i don't know why..
But sometimes i think is good to be oblivious..like a goldfish...everything seems so easy...you are in state of concord...
I have to admit that i agree with 7th and 9th statement..damn are true...
My best wishes for a happy new year..
Yannis
Yannis welcome! These past few months I've started to think that the statement "everything happens for a reason" might actually be true!
Maybe some things need to decline, disappears so new ones, better ones, come along. Maybe....
Happy new year to you too :)
In some sense i agree with you.Frankly i think that there is a strange affinity between what is in some sense predetermined and what is just chaotic and occures randomly..who knows...
thanks for the wishes..hopefully 2007 can be better...hopefully....
Happy new year darling, may this one be full of love, happiness, good health and friendships :-)
Love and kisses XxXxXxXxXxX
nice photo mad!
Happy New Year to you too!Hope this is a year full of love for you because you deserve it! x
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